Mice! Half-dead mice again! (New Zealand)

I should really title this something expat related, except Sharp Kitty is throwing a mouse around my living room and it is gross.

I can not understand the new zeeland accent. at all.  I am not even sure if that is how you spell new zeeland. I am pretty sure that it is off of Australia somehow.

Do not judge me. I used to think that Hawaii was next to California. Then I moved to the UK with the handy BBC and maps. I live on a small island off of Europe now and I can find FINLAND on the map. (no that isn’t where the cheese comes from. sigh. that is Wisconsin) I can find fucking Poland and Austria and even Turkey.

But the New Zealanders? (OK  I looked  it up) I cannot understand them at all. I know three things about New Zealand.

  • They have something to do with LOTR
  • Stephen Fry likes it there
  • Their rugby team is AWESOME (no, go look here if you don’t know.)

I cannot understand the talk that they do. nope. They use vowels in such a novel way.

Masterchef New Zealand, i wish that i could love you.

I have to get manboy to translate everything that they say. I am not sure who is more annoyed by this. Probably everyone in New Zealand, but from what I hear, they do not have the internet, so it should not matter.

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5 thoughts on “Mice! Half-dead mice again! (New Zealand)

  1. Darling, your understanding of geography is better than mine. I once insisted that there was no country called “Israel” because I couldn’t find it on a map. Plus, there are so many countries that change their damn names just to annoy me.

    Half dead mice bother me too. They could be zombie mice who are infecting your cat. Damn.

    New Zealand is somplace near Australia. It’s an island. They do talk funny there. Okay, one good thing I can say about New Zealand is this. They have sheep there. Oh, and one man who is very good in bed. Yes, I had a boyfriend from there. His skills were on the scale of 1 to 10, a flat out 20. I actually disliked him intensely because he was on pleasant (understatement) in the sack. The rest of the time I would have loved to keep him gagged. Provincial fellow. Much to my dismay, he would not allow me to gag him so I had to let him go. (I still have moments of regret 25 years later.)

    • Your comment was funnier than my post. Thank you. I still have ‘sleeping with an Australian and a South African’ on my bucket list. Not at the same time, of course. Apparently I need to add ‘that one guy from New Zealand’ to my list.

  2. I had a boyfriend from there too! He was from a very small town and felt as though he had to leave to avoid a lifetime working at the cheese factory. Which… didn’t really sound all that bad to me.

  3. I like the New Zealand accent. It sounds just like an Aussie accent (to me), accept somehow you can tell that it’s not Australian. I can’t tell why, but it just sounds more pleasant to me.

    Had an interesting one today. A salesman from my web hosting company phoned me. He was a guy from Detroit, USA. Both of us had a hard time understanding each other a few times, which surprised me – I thought that I was pretty much fluent in US-English because I watch so much US TV. I learnt that you guys don’t use the word ‘surname’. And even his accent left me wondering what he was saying a couple of times. I guess people on TV must enunciate more clearly than the average individual. As for myself, I noticed that I ‘posh up’ my otherwise Estuary English accent when speaking to an American to make myself better understood.

    You’ve probably already blogged about it, but have you had any communication issues since you’ve been here? How have you found the accents?

    • OMG i totally feel you. I sometimes have to use a fake British accent to make myself understood!
      I would like a wAter.
      huh
      wAter
      wha
      w’tah
      oh a w’tah.
      SIGH

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