I wrote this post a while back and included a paragraph about the total lack of weather here. This was a huge mistake.
I should know this by now. It only snows once every thirty years or so in the South West, but because I kept saying that, there has been more snow here than in the 50 years previous. I reversed that trend this year, and it did not snow.
Yep, I really do control the weather in the UK. I guess this is my superpower. Sorry England!
This is great until I get all asshole about it and start laughing at the UK’s lack of weather. Then the gods punish me and everyone else who has the misfortune to live here. It has gotten so bad that the other mums on the school run automatically blame me when weather happens. I was met today TWICE with the greeting: “this is your fault, isn’t it”. Scowling abounds.
I have been asked (not too politely) to please recant. OK OK There Is Weather Here!! Dammit.