I know that I sometimes have a hard time adjusting to life in my new country, but it is a really super place to live. This week I have been hearing stories about how my fellow parents in the USA are getting ready for school by buying tones of specific supplies and trying to get new clothes for the fall. I do not have any of that to deal with. Here is my back-to-school shopping list:
1) pencils (optional)
2) school uniform
That is it.
Read it and weep Americans!
I must get to the gravy bit. This is only for women of a certain size. Size of boob or of body.
I need to know: Can You Eat And Not Get The Food On Your Boobs Or In Your Bra?
I mentioned in one of my earlier laundry posts that My shirts are considered clean if they do not have gravy on them. I mean this. I am unable to eat food and only hit my mouth with it. Almost every meal that I have, some of it will end up on my shirt, on one or the other boob, or IN MY ACTUAL BRA.
I found a baked bean in my bra last week. This was a refreshing treat from the crumbs. A family of ducks could feed from my bra-crumbs some days. WHY? What is wrong with me?
Tell me that I am not alone!
In America, all I would get to do is argue. No matter what side I was on. I find this tiresome. Also, Boris Johnson is hot.
In America I would be dying of heat, but buying snow boots for the 3 feet of snow A DAY that was coming. Here? It is almost always Just Fine. 65 degrees damn-near-year-round Baby! Suck it Michigan!
In America I would be worried about my daughter who needs medicine. I do not care what you think. I get great care here in socialized-nazi-care-land.
Please tell me what you are thankful for in your country. And for the love-of-all-that-is holy…
Tell me if you have gravy on your boobs!